Self pleasuring is a wonderful way for a woman to explore her own body and play with her sexual energy. It gives her time to discover what excites her without being concerned about pleasing her partner. She gets to experiment with different types of touch, pressure, speed and erogenous zones.
Getting comfortable bringing yourself to climax is an empowering act. It also makes it possible to communicate to your lover how you like to be loved. Learning to communicate how you like to be loved is a great way to deepen intimacy with your partner and increase the likelihood of being touched the way that most pleases you.
Try this: Self-pleasure several times this week. As you pleasure yourself stay very present, noticing what you like in enough detail that you could tell a lover how to do it in the same way. Notice if any resistance comes up around self pleasuring.
If you have a lover and feel ready, self pleasure in front of him, showing him how you love yourself. Arrange a time when you can tell him how you like to be loved as he pleasures you.