Freda's Memorial

Thursday night December 8th we gathered in Sedona to honor my mother, Freda Morris Belden. I kept the event  casual and simple because that is how she would have wanted it to be. Twelve people came and shared their stories, songs and poems about Freda. Many people who could not attend sent emails to share their thoughts and memories. This picture was taken in June 2005 just before I moved to Sedona.

Here are some of the comments about her.

Freda was playful, fearless, flexible, integral, active, unconventional, multifaceted, ask for what she wanted, made herself at home, a teacher of love and one of the happiest people I have ever known. She loved to garden and had a green thumb.  There were also many comments about how much she loved her body and being in it. She liked to do chin-ups, somersaults, crawling around on the floor, sitting in the lotus position, she never sat on a chair in the normal way, and she  wasn’t afraid to ask to be massaged. She also loved to inspire others to stretch, grow  and expand beyond what was comfortable.

“I was Freda’s second best friend. Marion Pastor was her first best friend. She met her first. She reminded me of that frequently. I considered being her friend, in any position, a privilege. She taught me hypnosis and encouraged me to  launch the career that made me so very happy. She took a hick from New York City and introduced me to a world I had never known: psychic phenomenon, hallucinatory drugs that very much widened my perspective, Ericksonian hypnosis. We sneaked into places like nudist camps together and she taught me how to break silly rules. She was a heretic, the most unique human being I have ever known. When we talked about death, she told me she was looking forward to it as a new adventure and wondered what her next life would be like. I intend remebering that when I am dying. You will always be in my heart, beloved friend. I know you have created a momentous happening wherever you are.” Elaine Chernoff

Dear Cystal,  As you know, I can’t come to Freda’s Memorial, because of my physical condition, but my heart will be with you.  Freda wrote highly of my autobiography, which contained many references to her, particularly a description of her when we first met, when we were both employed at the Neurophychiatic Department of UCLA about 1969:

Wanting therapy ,”I  went to Freda Morris, a new psychologist on staff.  She was a puckish, startlingly uninhibited young woman who attracted me immmediately.  She wore no makeup and her light brown hair was casually short and straight in an era when most women wore makeup and had perrmanents.  She took off her her shoes and tucked her fet under her at meetings.  She expressed unconventional flashes of wisdom in her intrermittant Oklahoma twang, offten enough to make me respect her intelligence. She specialized in hypnosis and her Ph.D dissertaion had been in psychic phenomena.
“She looked me over with wide, sleepy-looking bliueeyes and accepted me as a psychotherapy patient. . . I soon found out just how unconventional she was, at the end of our first meeting that she suggested.that we do hypnotherapy on each other, switching roles each time.”

It was the beginning of more than forty years of friendship.  We both quit UCLA eventually and met again quite by chance a few years later in  San Francisisco.  We shared an apartment, then not.  We have been in and out of each other’s lives ever since.  I can’t say I’ll miss her, because I am now past ninety years of age.  Bon Voyage, Freda.  See you again, soon!.
Blessings,  Marion Pastor

“I was friends with Freda for 16 years after meeting her in a math class at UCSC. Some of my best memories of her are sharing time with her in the beautiful and tasty garden at Garfield Park and preparing and eating meals with her and many people over the years. If one story conveys her unique approach to life it was one of her tactics for meeting new, interesting people: She would take post it notes and write her phone number and “call me if you are interested in discussing this book” and put them in the back of books she liked at Bookshop Santa Cruz. I will miss her and remember her always for enriching my life in many, many ways. Goodbye Freda.” Jean-Paul Cane

I Love You, Freda

By Larry Rosenberg, December 8, 2011


Remember when she walked into a room

Our vitality, joy and love levels went up

She had a glowing presence all her own

You’d feel that your life had a fuller cup.

Her youthful energy belied her long age

With a mind as sharp as a razor’s edge

And a heart so eager to connect and grow

You knew where she stood, firmly with no hedge.

Her eyes had a leprechaun’s playful gleam

Her body more warmth than her small frame

Your time with her was an authentic encounter

If she rode a unicorn, she’d have no greater fame.

What was so magical about her every sharing?

She sure put the fun in life’s fundamentals

With her blending of wit, wonder and wisdom

She’d tap into a source of cosmic elementals.

All that she did made you a lifelong friend

Her aura embraced you as a cherished pal

You were with the high priestess of delight

From beret to toes, what an extraordinary gal.

Do you miss her bright communication style

And her opinions numbering more than a few?

What about her zest for life’s sweet nectar?

With all my being, I admit to you that I do.

You know for sure that she was one of a kind

Her vivid life produced a unique woman of arts

With gratitude to have shared our journeys

Precious memories of dear Freda fill our hearts.

July is Self-Love Month

Here are the 5 points of the Self-Love Star.

1. SELF-WORTH– Fill your own cup first. When you have a full cup you can be generous with others. Ask: Do I value my needs? Do I prioritize “me” time?

2. SELF-NURTURING– Nourish yourself. Ask: How do I love myself today?

3. SELF-EMPATHY– Have compassion for yourself. Feel and express your emotions. Trust your intuition.

4. SELF-EXPRESSION -What bold thing would you share with the world if the fear of judgment or rejection wasn’t holding you back?

5. SELF-ACCEPTANCE– Forgive yourself. Accept that you are doing the best you can with the resources you have?

Give yourself a Gold Star everyday!

Ho' oponopono, "To make right"

Ho’ oponopono is a practice from the Huna tradition of Hawaii. Essentially, it means to make things right with your ancestors and the other people with whom you have relationships. The original purpose of Ho’oponopono was to correct the wrongs that had occurred in one’s life including: Hala- to miss the thing aimed for, or to err, to disobey and Hewa- to go overboard or to do something to excess which were illusions, and ‘Ino- to do harm, implying to do harm to someone with hate in mind, even if accidental.

A simple way to practice this is to repeat this mantra:
I’m sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank You.

Here is a more elaborate practice that is especially helpful when dealing with difficult emotions like, anger, hate and fear. Ho’oponopono helps to clean up all our relationships with other people in our lives. Inside us we carry all the significant people in our lives. Doing Ho’oponopono allows us to clean and heal what no longer serves our highest good.

1. Bring to mind anyone with whom you do not feel total alignment or support, etc.
2. In your mind’s eye, construct a small stage below you.
3. Imagine an infinite source of love and healing flowing from a source above the top of your head (from your Higher Self), and open up the top of your head, and let the source of love and healing flow down inside your body, fill up the body, and overflow out your heart to heal up the person on the stage. Be sure it is all right for you to heal the person and that they accept the healing.
4. When the healing is complete, have a discussion with the person and forgive them, and have them forgive you.
5. Next, let go of the person, and see them floating away. As they do, cut the aka cord that connects the two of you (if appropriate). If you are healing in a current primary relationship, then assimilate the person inside you.
6. Do this with every person in your life with whom you are incomplete, or not aligned. The final test is, can you see the person or think of them without feeling any negative emotions. If you do feel negative emotions when you do, then do the process again.

I hope you find this a helpful practice.

Aloha

Tantra Tip of the Day- Let Go of Past and Future

Tantra is about living in the present moment. Past and future only exist in the mind. Being present is our natural state of awareness. As babies we know the beauty of being in the freshness of each new moment. Yet, pretty early in life our parents and our culture do their best to get us out of the Now. While happily being in the moment, we were told to eat when we weren’t hungry, made to go to sleep when we weren’t tired, forced to get up early for school, and told to stop playing and come inside, so a visitor could grill us about what we want to be when we grow up.

Let’s face it we live in a world obsessed with past and future. The news recaps the past; advertising tells what we need to be happy in the future. Reclaiming the joy of living in the Now can feel like a challenge at times. How can we reclaim the joy of being fully present in the Now?

Step 1- Develop the Witness. Notice when you are not in the moment. The witness is that part of us that watches what is happening in an unattached way. When I am lost in past or future I feel anxious, worried, or discontent. Past or future is a good place to hide when things aren’t going the way I planned. When I activate the Witness, it is easy to notice if I am lost in past or future. Then I return present moment awareness.

Step 2- Be Present. Presence arises when your essential nature -Awareness, awakens to itself in each moment. Awareness is beyond space and time, beyond life and death. When you are present, you let go of past and future. You surrender to the moment. There is no resistance to what is. Being present is not only about being aware of what is happening on the level of form, it is being aware of the very space in which all forms come and go.

Most people have had moments of Presence, even if they didn’t call it that. Have you ever had the experience of watching a sunset? The world became still and all thoughts disappeared, as you sat in awe aware of the beauty unfolding before you. Or perhaps you have had the experience of running a race, skiing or riding your bike and suddenly you entered “The Zone” where you were one with everything, and your movements were effortless. Or when looking into the eyes of a newborn baby or your beloved, have you ever felt yourself melting into them until all sense of separation dissolved and you experienced Oneness? In all these situations, Presence emerged as you became liberated from identification with the thinking mind and surrendered into the direct experience of The Now.

Step 3- Accept the Now. Living in the Now, means accepting everything going on around you and within you exactly as it is in that moment. Acceptance means letting of outcome. It does not mean that you are a victim. You can make a conscious choice to shift what is happening through your actions and intentions. When you accept each moment as it is, the quality of Being becomes palpable and stress vanishes.

By developing the witness, living in the present moment and accepting what is, you will discover that you can learn to let go of living in the past. By aligning with your essential nature, spiritual wakefulness is arrived upon naturally.

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(C) Copyright 2009, Crystal Dawn Morris, all rights reserved.

Eye Gazing and Communion – A Poem

Eye Gazing and Communion

Warmth shining on my face
My heart flowing into yours
Connection grows
You seeing me
Like honey, so sweet

Diving deeper into a dark pool
Still, calm and familiar
A homecoming
I see you
Like honey, so sweet

Energy grows and flows
Expands and melts all boundaries
Tears, smiles, tears and smiles
We know each other
Beyond form
Sisters of light and emptiness

Crystal Dawn Morris
June 6, 2009

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(C) Copyright 2009, Crystal Dawn Morris, all rights reserved.

Tantra Tip of the Day – Say Yes to Life

Tantra says, “Yes! To what is. Yes, to this moment. Yes, to being you, as you are, now.”

When you surrender into this moment and allow everything to be as it is, you become aware that all is one. You’re in the flow, neither resisting what is or grasping after something other than what is, to be happy. Resistance creates suffering, striving after some imagined future, creates suffering. Accepting yourself as you are, this moment as it is, the people around you as they are, life as it is, allows you to relax, open and just be. This is freedom.

Today, notice when you say yes to the moment and when you resist the moment. Experiment with saying yes, even when your habit would be to say no. If you find yourself in heavy traffic instead of cursing, and insisting this is not as it should be. Try accepting that you are in a traffic jam. If that isn’t possible, then accept that you are choosing to be in resistance to what is. Then notice if your resistance is causing suffering. Once you are aware of the suffering, see if you can soften your resistance. See the humor in your situation; laugh at how serious you are being. Try taking a deep breath, as you exhale relax and let go of trying to control the world around you. Notice how it feels to surrender into the moment. See what happens when you let go of resistance.

Original Art by Paul Heussenstamm, www.Mandalas.com

(C) Copyright 2009, Crystal Dawn Morris, all rights reserved.
www.TantraForAwakening.com
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